After going through this personal style guide, you won’t ever feel like you have nothing to wear. Let’s go, queens!
On my journey to be more ‘stylish’, I made Pinterest boards, copied influencers, and did expensive brand hauls.
But even when I managed to find outfits that were a ditto copy of what my fav online girlie was wearing, I never felt like it was enough.
In the end, what actually helped me become more fashionable was finding my own personal style.
And take my word on this, it’s true for every single woman out there. Nothing will make you more confident than wearing a style that is authentically you.
I’m talking about your style. The kind that feels like home. The kind that makes you walk different. The kind that people remember.
For me, finding my personal style has been a journey of getting smart, specific, and ‘me’, and I want to share all of that with you.
If you’ve ever stood in front of your closet and felt like throwing a tantrum because nothing feels right, this post is for you.
Let’s go in!
How To Find Your Personal Style
1. Forget the Aesthetic Labels
The very first thing you need to do here is forget the aesthetic labels that you discovered on TikTok or YouTube or whatever.
Clean girl, Y2K, baddie, soft grunge, coconut grandma — Let it all go!
These labels can be fun, I won’t deny, and you may even find me doing posts on some of them in the future (because as I said, fun).
But these labels are also boxes that limit your style. But your style is not a hashtag, right? And you are not a Pinterest mood board.
The second you try to fit into a pre-made aesthetic, you kill what makes your vibe original.
So, ditch the labels, and ask yourself, ‘What do I like?’
And your response shouldn’t stem from what’s trending, or from what looks good on That Girl.
Just think about what makes you feel excited to get dressed, and that’s gonna be your starting point.
Like, my answer to this simple question would be dresses, flared jeans and trousers, fitted tops, and quality white sneakers. What about you?
2. Know Your Lifestyle, Not Just Your vibe
If you ignore your life’s demands while building your style, you’ll keep buying clothes that look great online but sit untouched in your closet.
Your style has to serve your life, not the other way around. So, before you figure out what you like, figure out what you do.
Are you commuting to work on a packed train every morning, or sitting at a desk for 8 hours?
Do you have kids to run after? Are you jumping between college classes and campus cafés? Or maybe dressing up for events every other weekend?
You’ve gotta build your personal style keeping your lifestyle in demand.
Take me for an example. I really love heels, but I also clock 10k steps every day and have to haul groceries up three flights of stairs (the elevator in my building is always out of service, ugh).
So, my everyday style includes platform sneakers and wide-leg trousers. It’s kinda the same vibe, but way more wearable.
As another example, if you love romantic long skirts but work in a lab all day (just got done reading ‘The Love Hypothesis, hence the example), then a midi with fun socks and comfy clogs can give you the same feel without getting in the way.
See, the goal here isn’t to give up what you love. It’s to translate it into something that fits your actual routine.
This way, your style will stop being a fantasy and start being real.
3. Audit Your Clothes Like a Fashion Editor
Pick a Sunday, make a coffee, put on a playlist, and then pull everything out of your closet. Yes, literally everything, even that one random dress you keep ‘just in case’.
Now, make three piles:
- HELL YES: You wear it often. You feel amazing in it. It fits right now, not “once I lose five pounds” right.
- MEH: You kind of like it, but never actually wear it. Maybe it’s itchy, awkward, or maybe you’re just not that into it.
- WHY DO I OWN THIS: Doesn’t fit, doesn’t feel good, brings back weird memories, or was a panic-buy during a 2am online sale. You know the ones.
You’ve gotta be brutally honest with yourself here.
Once you’ve sorted it all, take a hard look at your HELL YES pile. What do those pieces have in common? Is it the fit, the color, the fabric?
Or maybe the way they make you feel like the most you version of yourself?
The answer will serve as clues to your actual style. And once you see the pattern, shopping (and getting dressed) will get much easier.
The rest of the two piles will tell you what ‘not’ to buy in the future. Easy peasy.
4. Choose Three ‘Style Words’ For Yourself
This is such a fun exercise, and you’re going to love it! You have to pick three words. Just three.
These should be the words that describe the energy you want your style to give.
These words will be like your personal style North Stars. Everything you wear should vibe with at least one (ideally all) of the words.
So take a minute. Think about how you want to show up in the world. What’s the energy you want your outfits to radiate?
Here, lemme give you some examples:
- Sleek, sporty, minimal
- Romantic, vintage, playful
- Tough, chic, clean
- Artsy, loud, confident
My current words are: pastel, comfy, and feminine.
If I’m debating an outfit or a new piece, I run it through that filter. If it doesn’t align, it’s a no for me, no matter how trendy or cute it is.
Once you have your words figured out, stick to them. It’ll help you say no to impulse buys and yes to the pieces that actually build your style.
5. Pick Your Power Silhouettes
You don’t need a million different fits. You need, like, five that work, and work every time.
So, we’re going to gorget the trends for a second, and just focus on shapes.
The cuts that flatter you, move with you, and make you feel like you actually know what you’re doing (even when you’re just throwing something on).
Some examples:
- High-waisted wide-leg trousers
- Cropped, boxy jackets
- Fitted mock neck tops
- A-line mini skirts
- Oversized button-ups
Personally, I live in high-waist flared bottoms and slightly fitted topwear. Fit-and-flare dresses are also my jam. They really get me.
When you find your power silhouettes, style becomes stupid easy. You’ll stop second-guessing yourself and buying random pieces that don’t go with anything.
6. Find Your Colors
Not everyone looks good in black. I know it’s chic and slimming or whatever, but if it makes you look tired or washed out, it’s not your color. Period.
Instead of forcing random colors on yourself, start paying attention to what actually works for you.
What colors make your skin glow? What shades make your eyes pop, your face light up, your energy shift?
Go stand in front of a window in natural light, and hold different colored tops or scarves up to your face.
Some will make you look like you just got back from vacation, others will make you look like you haven’t slept in days.
Once you’ve got a feel for your colors, build your personal palette:
- 2–3 neutrals you can wear on repeat (like beige, navy, cream, olive, whatever works for you)
- 2–3 signature colors that make you feel alive
- 1–2 wild cards that are fun, bold, and a little unpredictable (because why not?)
That’s your mix right there. With your color palette in hand, you won’t have to second guess anymore and buying things will be easy peasy.
7. Create Five Go-To Outfit Formulas
Outfit formulas save lives. Okay, maybe not literally, but they do save mornings, and that’s close enough.
These are the combos you can throw on in five minutes and look amazing.
They fit your lifestyle, match your vibe, and take zero brainpower when you’re running late or just not in the mood.
A few examples:
- Oversized blazer, graphic tee, biker shorts, sneakers
- Turtleneck, midi skirt, tall boots, crossbody
- Linen trousers, tank top, chunky sandals, claw clip
- Fitted top, high-rise jeans, hoops, slides
- Button-up, slip skirt, low heels, messy bun
Start testing different combos with the pieces you already love. What feels good? What works over and over again?
Once you’ve nailed down five go-to outfits, write them down or save them in your notes app. Know them like your coffee order.
That way, even when your brain says “I have nothing to wear,” your formulas already have your back.
8. Take Loads of Selfies
For, outfit selfies are like my style data. They’re one of the smartest things you can do while finding your personal style.
Every time you wear something and feel even a little bit like ‘that girl’, snap a pic.
And don’t worry about getting it perfect. You’re not doing it for the likes. You’re doing it so you can see what’s working.
Then at the end of the week, go to your gallery, scroll through, and see which outfits made you feel confident, cool, like yourself. And see which ones felt off, even if they looked good in theory.
You’ll start spotting patterns. You’ll know cuts you love, colors that pop, little details that click.
It’s like building a personal style archive in real time. You’ll always have a go-to outfit idea waiting in your camera roll.
9. Accessorize With Intention
Accessories aren’t filler, babe. They’re the seasoning of your outfits.
Most of the time, when you wanna be more stylish, you don’t need more clothes. You need better add-ons.
Try playing with:
- Statement earrings
- Tiny bags (the impractical kind; we love them)
- Big belts
- Hair scarves
- Funky sunglasses
- Socks with a little personality
Don’t just throw stuff on for the sake of it. Choose pieces that actually add to your look.
Pick three signature accessories that feel super you, and start building them into your outfits. Over time, they’ll become your thing.
10. Find Your Fashion Expanders
Fashion expanders are the people whose style pushes you and makes you think, without making you feel like you’re pretending to be someone else.
It could be:
- A friend who always shows up looking effortlessly cool
- A celebrity muse
- A niche stylist on IG whose outfits make you stop scrolling
Now, here’s where the best part comes. You are not going to copy them. Nope, I was very clear on that in the beginning of this post.
You’re actually going to study what they’re doing the right.
Is it the way they layer, their color choices, or maybe how they mix casual and polished?
Then ask yourself: ‘How can I take that idea and make it feel like me?’
You fashion expanders will help stretch your style comfort zone. Just enough to evolve, without losing yourself in the process.
11. Trust Your Taste
This is the most important part, which is why I’ve saved it for the last. None of the rest matters if you skip this point.
You know what you like. You’ve always known.
Maybe you buried it under trends, or second-guessed it because it didn’t get compliments, or dimmed it down to fit in.
But it was there, and it still is.
Remember that time in high school (or whenever) when you wore something bold and people stared? And you instantly wanted to crawl into a hole?
That was probably the first time your real style tried to show up. Yeah, you need to reclaim it.
You don’t really need more opinions. You need more confidence in your own eye.
That’s how personal style is built. Not through perfection, but through permission.
So give yourself the freedom to like what you like.
Trust your gut, because that’s your style. And no one else can do it like you.
